


All Of Us Against All Of Them

by JustHereForLaughs



Category: Good Omens (TV)
Genre: Established Relationship, Fluff, M/M, Minor Angst, Plot, Post-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-13
Updated: 2020-10-03
Packaged: 2021-02-28 03:01:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 16
Words: 11,770
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22696789
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JustHereForLaughs/pseuds/JustHereForLaughs
Summary: Without Heaven and Hell breathing down their neck, Aziraphale and Crowley think they can settle down.  How wrong they are!  The Head Offices are still working and hope to regain control of the renegades.  Michael has a plot of her own and Adam might still have powers.  ((Starts right after everyone leaves the air force base. They are already married and have been for a while.))
Relationships: Aziraphale & Crowley (Good Omens), Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens), Beelzebub & Gabriel (Good Omens), Beelzebub/Gabriel (Good Omens)
Kudos: 14





	1. Chapter 1

The air base was quiet now. Almost everyone had gone home or back to their head offices. The only ones remaining were Aziraphale, Crowley, and the sleeping guards. Aziraphale collapsed into Crowley’s arms. “Please take me home,” he said. He was tired, so much had happened and possessing a body took a lot of energy.

Crowley looked at the angel. He seemed weak, something Crowley never expected to see. “Ok, we’ll go home,” he said gently. Crowley turned back to his car but remembered that it was inoperable. He sighed and opened his wings. He picked up Aziraphale bridal style and flew back to their penthouse. He landed just outside and walked in, ignoring the strange looks from passing people. Crowley took Aziraphale up stairs and laid him in the bed.

Aziraphale looked up at Crowley and grabbed his hand. He said, “Don’t stay up long dear, ok?”

Crowley, on the other hand, wasn’t tired, after all, it was only 4 in the afternoon. But he couldn’t say no to his adorable angel. He took a few minutes to spray his plants and then climbed into bed. The demon wrapped his long arms around Aziraphale and pulled him close. He thought he had lost him today. Crowley couldn’t let that happen again. The only thing he didn’t like about his relationship with Aziraphale was the feelings. Demons aren’t supposed to feel much, especially not love or fear. He tried to shove the thoughts away. They resurfaced as the memory of their first kiss. It was right after the fall of rome. They had each heard that the other had been discorporated. This would mean at least a year apart as they went through the paperwork to get a new body. When they finally found each other they couldn’t help it. That was the first time despair and fear surfaced in his heart. He had hoped it would be the last time, but it had come back. As Crowley thought about their history, he found himself dreaming.

It was around midnight when Aziraphale awoke. Something was bothering him. Why did Heaven and Hell just let them go? They were the reason the world didn’t end and they didn’t get their precious war. And that last prophecy, was it directed at him? He laid, there turning the subject over in his mind until the answer came to him. They needed to regroup before they held a trial and it would take them a while to organize it. Then they would find them, and destroy them. There weren’t many things that destroyed angels and demons and the head offices lacked any imagination. So if they switched forms, Heaven and Hell would use hellfire on Crowley and holy water on him. They would both be fine. He tapped Crowley, “Wake up. I just realized something.”

He blinked awake and turned to look at Aziraphale. He stared vacantly for a moment, processing, before asking, “What is it, angel?” and groggily rubbing his eyes.

Aziraphale explained his theory. When he had finished, Crowley agreed. “Since we don’t know how close they are to being ready, we should switch now,” he said, holding out his hand.

Crowley nodded but didn’t take the outstretched hand. As much as he knew Aziraphale was probably right, it was gonna be wierd looking at an Aziraphale that looked like him. _It’s still my angel_ , he reminded himself as he reached out. The transfer was quick and nothing felt different until he tried to stand. He never really noticed that Aziraphale was shorter than he was.

They spent the rest of the night figuring out how their new bodies worked . Aziraphale was slightly better at it then Crowley since he had practice when he possessed Madame Tracy. They laughed at each other as they stumbled around the room. The severity of the situation almost slipped their minds.

As the sun started to rise, Aziraphale and Crowley started to calm down. “I need to go see if anything survived the fire,” Aziraphale said. He headed toward the door.

Crowley grabbed his arm. “No, no, no,” he said, “You look like me. If they find you there, it’ll be suspicious. I’ll go and I’ll call you if I find anything.”

“Ok, you’re right,” Aziraphale said. He kissed Crowley goodbye.

Crowley returned it but he scrunched his nose, “That was weird. Let’s not do that again.”

Aziraphale shook his head, “Yeah, no. See you soon, I hope,”

“Don’t say that,”Crowley said as he walked out the door.

Not many people were up and the ones that were seemed in a daze. He walked to where the bookstore had stood. It was back, like new. He walked inside, confused. Everything seemed to be back in place. He wandered all the way to the back. The only thing that had changed were a new set of children's books. He pulled out his phone to tell Aziraphale the good news.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ((Skip to the diner at the Ritz after the trials and switch back))

“Well,” Crowley said leaning farther back in his chair, “I’m ready to go home. What about you?” He smiled at Aziraphale who was still sipping on his wine.

  
Aziraphale nodded and downed the rest of his drink. “Let’s go. It’s been a stressful week and I think we both deserve some _rest_.” Aziraphale winked at the demon next to him and placed a hand on his thigh.

“Oh!” Crowley chuckled, “Waiter!” He miracled some money into existence to pay the bill and then they walked back to their penthouse.

“You know, if you do that a lot, you're going to screw up the economy,” warned Aziraphale.

“Oh, he’ll lose it in a few hours,” Crowley muttered.

When they got home, it was their normal nightly routine. Crowley “tends” to his house plants and Aziraphale sits in bed trying to read a book but mostly just laughing at Crowley’s method of caring for plants.

Crowley scanned his plants one final time. They had been doing very well today, one of them even bloomed. He had an idea.

Aziraphale jumped when Crowley appeared in front of him. “Oh my… Crowley, don’t do that!” He shouted.

Crowley smiled and presented a marigold. “This is for you,” he said, moving closer to the angel.

Aziraphale smiled, taking the flower. “Ah, how nice,” he said, not really looking at the flower. He just stared into Crowley’s vibrant yellow eyes. They stayed like that for a few moments. Aziraphale slid the book off of his lap and pulled Crowley in for a kiss.


	3. Chapter 3

Crowley woke the next morning to an empty bed. Not surprising really, Aziraphale usually went to the book shop early. What was surprising was the sounds coming from the kitchen. He dragged himself out of bed to yell at the intruder. However, it wasn’t a thief, it was Aziraphale, cooking breakfast. “Angel, erm, why are you cooking? You could just make it appear.”

Aziraphale nodded as he dished eggs, bacon, and toast onto two plates. “I know. Ready to eat?” He said as he set them on the table. He sat down.

Crowley raised an eyebrow as he sat. “I guess but why?” He took a bite of the toast. It was good, if a little burned.

“Well,” he began, “A few years ago you said it would be nice to have a hobby for both of us. I was thinking that perhaps our hobby could be cooking.”

Crowley was impressed. “That was like a decade ago. I can’t believe you remembered that,” he said

“I remembered but we were busy watching the boy we thought was the antichrist so I couldn’t look into ideas,” he said.

“How did you come across this idea?”

“Well, I found this wonderful website called Pinterest. It's got all sorts of ideas for hobbies.”

Crowley almost spat out his orange juice. “You used the internet? Who are you and what have you done with my husband?”

Azirahpale pouted a little. “Don’t be like that, Crowley. I know how to use the internet. I’ve done it before.”

“I’m not making fun of you, Angel,” Crowley said softly.

They finished breakfast with their usual talk and laughter. Crowley agreed to clean up while Aziraphale went to the book shop.

It was a bit warm outside and the streets were busy. Aziraphale walked quickly since he was already late. He unlocked the shop and immediately went to the new books Crowley had mentioned. Sure enough, they were signed first editions. He brought them into his back room and took out his binder. All the books he ever had were recorded in this binder. He had just started putting them into his records when the room got hot, hellishly hot. He turned around in his chair and fear flashed through him like lightning.

Beelzebub stood by the door. “Hello, Aziraphale,” she said. She didn’t look threatening exactly, just out of place among the brighter tones of the office.

“H...hello,” he stuttered. He got up to face her. “Can I help you?” he asked. He couldn’t keep his voice from quivering.

“Yes,” she took a step forward, “I would like to offer you a job.”

Aziraphale was confused now. He asked, “Are you sure you have the right person? I mean...uh...I don’t work for you.”

Beelzebub nodded, “We know, but given recent, er, events we thought you might be interested in a career change.”

“No! That’s...that’s unthinkable!” He shook his head vigorously, “Definitely not. Now, if that is all, please leave.” He was offended that anyone would think he would be willing to work for Hell.

“Ok,” Beelzebub said, nodding respectfully, a rare occasion, and she vanished. The room immediately back cooled down.

Aziraphale stood, slightly stunned, for a moment before returning to the desk and new children's books. He couldn’t focus though and it took him an hour to write down just 6 books. He kept thinking about the way Beelzebub acted. She had seemed almost scared. _That’s ridiculous. She’s the Prince of Hell. Why would she be scared?_ But his thoughts refused to be buried.

Crowley wandered around the apartment. _Nothing to do_ , he thought. He looked out the window. People and cars scurried around below. He took a moment to perform a few small temptations before going back to his pacing. Finally, he couldn’t stand it anymore and decided to go on a walk. As usual, he walked around St. James Park. It was a nice enough day that there were many people out, riding bikes, jogging, walking, picnicking, and other things. He noticed one runner that lapped him like five times. He was too fast for Crowley to really see but he seemed familiar. Each time it seemed the runner thought about stopping but didn’t. The next time he came around, Crowley decided to stop him. When he finally got a look at this person though, he regretted it.

Gabriel stood before him. “Hello, Crowley,” he said calmly.

“Why were you following me?” Crowley snapped. He didn’t let his panic show to the archangel. He couldn’t figure out what Gabriel wanted with him but it couldn’t be good.

“Well,” Gabriel said, “you have proven that you are too good for Hell. You tried to stop the apocalypse and survived holy water. Those are traits more like an angel then a demon.”

Crowley raised an eyebrow. He didn’t believe the respect in Gabriel’s voice was sincere. “What’s your point, Gabriel?” He asked warily.

“I have been sent to ask if you wanted to be restored to your position as an angel,” he said matter of factly.

The words took a moment to set in. Crowley stared blankly. _No way. Is that even possible?_ He wanted to believe it but he couldn’t. “What are you playing at?” he shouted, balling his fists. He went with anger instead of hope. How could Gabriel say that? Toying with him for Satan knows what purpose.

Gabriel knew why he was suspicious. He hadn’t known that it was even possible until a few hours ago. Metatron has told him to go to Crowley and offer him a position in Heaven. He would be restored to his original angelic form if he accepted. It was apparently possible but never happened. Gabriel was not pleased with any of this information. “It is possible, I promise. Though I’m not sure how exactly,” he tried to explain, “You will have been the first it ever actually happened to though. This comes from God herself, well, technically Metatron but you get it.”

Crowley dared to consider the possibility that Gabriel might be telling the truth. That would be great. _No more smell of sulfur everywhere and Aziraphale and I wouldn’t have to hide our relationship_. “Ok,” he said carefully, “If this is true, I’ll need some time to think about it.”

Gabriel said, “I will check back in a week, ok?”

Crowley nodded. “Fine,” he said. Gabriel vanished leaving Crowley alone with his thoughts once more. He rushed back to the flat. He needed to talk to Aziraphale, but first he wanted lunch.


	4. Chapter 4

Michael waited patiently for Gabriel to return. When he finally did, she was there. “So, did he accept?” she asked

Gabriel shook his head and replied, “No, he said he needed some time to think about it. I told him he had a week.”

Michael was a patient angel and didn’t mind waiting another week to set her plan in action. “Have you considered that he might say no and then we will need a new ambassador,” she said in a sly tone, “If he does ultimately decline, I would be willing to go down there by myself. I could even keep an eye on those two.” She hoped she had been convincing.

“Perhaps. But if you go down, you need to leave them alone. They are still friends with the antichrist so we don’t want to risk getting in a fight with them,” he responded coolly. Michael seemed more focused on the two rebels then anyone else, even Hell and they invented the grudge. “For now we assume that he will say yes and you will be his partner,” Gabriel said. He left Micael standing in the main room alone.

Michael smiled. _So far so good_ , she thought.


	5. Chapter 5

Aziraphale heard the bell above the door ring. “Can I help you?” He said from behind a bookshelf.

“Hello, Mr. Aziraphale,” replied a familiar voice. 

Aziraphale smiled and walked out to greet him. “Hello Adam. What are you looking for today?” All four of The Them were there but Aziraphale couldn’t remember the others' names.

Adam looked around the shop. He looked pleased. “I was just coming by to ask if the shop was to your liking.”

Aziraphale nodded and responded, “Yes. It is very nice. Thank you for the new books.”

Adam bit his lip, embarrassed. He hadn’t meant to change anything but his imagination had run away a bit. 

Pepper spoke up, “Do you have any books about faking your death?

Aziraphale gave her a worried look. “Whatever for?” He asked. 

“We are starting school in a week and I reckon if I pretend to die, I don’t have to go to school,” she replied. 

Aziraphale chuckled, “I’m afraid not. Besides, school can’t be that bad.”

Pepper frowned. The Them started wandering around the book shop. Aziraphale was glad to see children taking an interest in his books.

The bell rang again. In walked Crowley carrying a plate covered in parchment paper. He snapped his fingers and the door closed behind him. “Angel,” he said, rather loudly, “we might have a problem.” 

Aziraphale tilted his head, “What is it Crowley?”

Crowley looked at the kids and shook his head, “We can’t talk here.” 

Adam looked up at Crowley, “We can leave if you want.”

Crowley started to speak, “That w-“

Aziraphale interrupted him, “No, we will just go to the back room. Come along dear.” Aziraphale grabbed his arm and led them to the dimly lit back room. Crowley plopped down into his chair and placed the plate on the small coffee table. Aziraphale took his seat and asked, “What’s the issue, dear?”

Crowley sighed and started recounting the events of the afternoon. “Then I went home and tried to make some cookies. It didn’t work very well so I threw them away and miracled some. Want one?” He finished, pulling the parchment off the plate.

Aziraphale sat quietly and listened to the whole thing. “Oh! You baked!” He said in mock shock as he took a cookie from the plate. 

“Yeah, yeah. Shut up,” retorted Crowley.

“I actually had something similar happen to me.” Aziraphale finished his cookie and told Crowley about the visit from Beelzebub. 

They thought about the implications of all this in heavy silence for a while. All of the cookies were gone by the time someone had something to say. Aziraphale was the first to ask, “Well, are you going to accept the offer?”

Crowley nodded slowly, “If Gabriel is telling the truth, which I doubt, probably.”

Aziraphale eyes widened at this reply. “But Crowley, what about our own side. That was your idea,” he said, “Don’t you want to stay here.”

Crowley rolled his eyes, “Of course I want to stay on earth. That’s where you are. But if I take this job, we don’t have to be secretive about our relationship. I never said I would leave.”

Aziraphale shook his head, “Be realistic. There is no way that head office would let you stay here. Plus, as far as they are concerned, I am no longer part of Heaven. So it still wouldn’t be allowed.”

“Well right now, I just need to get more information. See if this is real and what exactly my job would be,” he said, “What about you? Have you thought about what you are going to do?”

Aziraphale shifted uncomfortably in his chair. “No,” he said finally.

Crowley gave a half-hearted laugh, “Took you a moment, did it?” He thought about it for a second and spoke again, “Actually, it might be better for you to take the offer. Hell encourages human relationships to, uh, ‘lead them to sin’. If you became a demon, then even if they don’t let me return, our thing could still be public.”

Aziraphale tried to think. His entire world had fallen apart in the last 48 hours. Now Crowley was asking him to take it even farther. He felt like he was drowning. He needed something to hold to. Usually Crowley knew just what to say. Since the beginning of time, his demon had helped him through troubles and worries but today, Crowley wasn’t giving him a solid answer. “No,” he said again, even less certain than before, “I can’t, Crowley. I just...” He didn’t have a reason why. It just felt wrong.

Crowley nodded understandingly. “Ok, angel,” he said, “it’s your choice.” He needed a distraction from the confusion of the day. He summoned one of the wine bottles from the shelf and opened it. He grabbed one of the glasses that always sat on the little coffee table and poured some. The demon gave it to Aziraphale and then poured himself some. He and Crowley moved to the couch so they could be next to each other. They were almost flat drunk when there was a knock on the door.

Aziraphales eyes widened, “Oh no! I totally forgot they were here!” He quickly sobered up and answered it.

Wendslydale stood there. “I just wanted to let you know we were leaving. Adam said not to bother because you had already forgotten but I still thought it would be polite.”

“Oh,” Aziraphale smiled, “Thank you.”

Wendslydale said goodbye and headed out the door to where his friends were waiting.

Aziraphale waved and then quickly went back to his seat. “Now, where were we?”

“Getting very drunk,” Crowley said before downing the rest of his drink and pouring some more.

“Ah, yes,” replied the angel.

Anyone who came into the shop after this found it deserted and perhaps browsed a bit but was ultimately unable to buy anything. The two fell asleep in the back room that night, on the couch, Aziraphale in Crowley’s lap.


	6. Chapter 6

Crowley awoke. His yellow eyes quickly adjusted to the bright room. Aziraphale was still snoozing with his head resting on the demon’s chest. Crowley kissed him gently on the forehead. “Wake up, angel,” he whispered.

Aziraphale’s eyes blinked open. He smiled when he saw Crowley. “Good morning Crowley,” he said. He leaned up and kissed him back. “What shall we do today?”

Crowley thought for a moment. “You should actually run your business. No doubt people were very confused yesterday,” he said, “And I am going to try to talk to Gabriel.”

Aziraphale winced at the last part. He had hoped Crowley had forgotten. “Yes, I probably should,” he agreed as he stood up.

Crowley also rose from the couch. He didn’t want Aziraphale to leave yet. As Aziraphale went to open the door, he wrapped his arms around him from behind, holding him back. “Wait a minute,” he said as he placed a multitude of kisses on the angel’s neck.

Aziraphale held the arms around his waist. “But I need to go,” he protested half heartedly. He let himself stay in Crowley’s embrace for a few more minutes before saying again, more firmly, “I really do need to go.”

Crowley released him this time. “Ok. You do your thing,” he said and they walked out of the back room. Crowley left the bookshop to figure out how to get in contact with Gabriel.

Crowley figured he should go to the spot they last talked. He got in his car and sped off to the park. As he walked, he kept an eye out for Gabiel’s gray tracksuit. After walking around the lake a few times, he abandoned the prospect. _I wonder if they have phones in heaven_ , he thought. He drove back to the flat to think and eat.

Aziraphle went around to everyone already in the shop, apologizing for yesterday and helping them find things. After it cleared out a bit, he was able to think about Beelzebub’s proposal again. _Crowley was right, it would be nice to not always worry about being found out. But is that really a concern any more?_ he pondered, _But then again, Hell holds grudges. They might still object to us being literally married_. He debated talking to Beelzebub but decided against it. She gave him the creeps.

His phone rang, interrupting his thoughts. He answered it, “Hello, this is Mr. Fell’s Bookstore. How can I help you?”

“Hey angel,” said Crowley on the other side, “Any idea how I should get in touch with Gabriel? I’ve never had reason to so I don’t know how.”

Aziraphale shook his head even though Crowley couldn’t see him, “No, Heaven is a no phone area. You might be able to get there through the stairs but I don’t know if they work differently for demons.”

“Worth a shot I guess. Thank you, I love you, bye.” Crowley hung up.

Aziraphale tried to say “I love you” back but Crowley hung up before he could.

Crowley drove to the building that held the main entrances to heaven and hell. He walked through the spinning doors to the lobby. He looked up the blue side that Aziraphale always took. He couldn’t see anything but white light at the top. He took a deep breath and climbed up. It had been several millennia since he was last up here. The angels had done a bit of remodeling. The windows were glass now and the globe had changed a little. The main room was empty. He called out, “Gabriel...Hello?”

Gabriel appeared in front of him. “How did you get up here?” he boomed. He looked embarrassed at yelling and regained his composure.

Crowley stepped back and brushed off his jacket as if Gabriel’s appearance had tossed dust onto it. “I’m here to get more information for the job,” he stated.

Gabriel nodded, “Fair enough. Come into my office, we don’t want you to cause a panic.” He started to lead the way but Crowley didn’t follow.

“No,” he said firmly, “We meet on neutral ground. I’ll only discuss this at the park.” He turned around and headed back down the stairs. He went to the park, bought a vanilla ice cream, and waited on one of the benches. Gabriel walked up a few minutes later.

“Well, I’m here. What do you want?”

Crowley took another bite of his ice cream before replying. “First off,” he said, “What exactly would my job be?”

Gabriel sat down on the bench. “You would remain stationed on earth since you know the place. But you would have a partner to make sure you don’t talk to Aziraphale.”

Crowley knew it would be hard to lose the angel sent to spy on him. “Ok, who would my partner be?” he asked.

“Michael.”

“So this is a real offer. No tricks or lies?”

“Unfortunately, yes.”

Crowley sighed, “Alrighty. That’s all. You can pop back to your office.” In an instant, he was alone again. He couldn’t do it. There was no way he would be able to avoid the archangel Michael and he knew it.


	7. Chapter 7

When Aziraphale got home that evening Crowley was waiting. “Good, your home. I have decided I’m not going to take Gabriel’s offer.”

Aziraphale was so relieved. “Good. I assume you told him this.”

Crolwey shook his head.

“Why not?” Aziraphale asked

“Because, I like messing with him. He never was a patient one,” Crowley responded.

Aziraphale was glad that Crowley hadn’t lost his slight demonic tendencies. Although he didn’t agree with many of Crowley’s actions and his leaning towards evil, it made him interesting and lovable. “What do you want for dinner?” Aziraphale said, changing the subject.

“What about that one chicken casserole you got the recipe for in 1540 something,” said Crowley walked into the kitchen. The lights flicked on and Crowley rummaged through their pile of recipes. They had been untouched since the last one had been added. They had never actually used these recipes but Aziraphale still had asked for recipes to dishes he really liked. He found it and handed it to Azirphale.

Aziraphale smiled at the memory it brought up. “The one we served at our wedding! Yes, let’s make that.” He started to pull things out of cupboards Crowley was sure they had never stocked.

“Let’s? How about you make it. I’ll watch,” replied Crowley.

Aziraphale gave Crowley a pleading look, “Come on Crowley, it’ll be fun.”

The demon sighed, “Ok, fine.” He began reading through the list of things they needed.

It took them longer than they thought it should but they successfully made the casserole without burning down the flat. It wasn’t too bad in their opinion. They ate and talked about their wedding, reliving all the funny moments. “Remember how you got so drunk that you tried to burn the wedding certificate,” said Aziraphale.

“I did what? I don’t remember that!.” Crowley didn’t remember this event but felt bad he had done that, even drunk.

Aziraphale shook his head, “You got really drunk and you said, ‘Have fun trying to return me without the receipt.’ In my opinion, that was the best thing you ever did for me.”

“Even, the books in World War 2 wasn’t better than that?” asked Crowley.

Aziraphale nodded, “Even that wasn’t as good. Mostly because it wasn’t funny. Our wedding was the most hilarious thing that happened in all the 6,000 years we have known each other.” Crowley smiled. They continued chatting for a while and eventually made their way to bed.


	8. Chapter 8

A week later, Gabriel met Crowley at the park. “I have my decision,” Crowley said as he sat down next to Gabriel. 

Gabriel waited for Crowley to continue but he didn’t. “Well?” he asked. 

“I don’t want to work for you. I will continue my life here and won’t interfere with whoever you send. As long as they don’t bother me, that is.”

Gabriel nodded. “Ok, the new angel will be given instructions not to interact with you. If they do, alert me and I will deal with it. Good day,” he said. Gabriel stood up and walked away.

Crowley felt an uneasiness as he watched Gabriel leave. It lingered even once he had vanished. Crowley forced himself to forget about it. He drove to the bookshop out of boredom. 

When he arrived, it was extremely crowded. He sighed with annoyance and went into the back room before turning into a snake. He then slithered out to the register and fell asleep on the counter. Many of the customers found some other place to be when a large red and black snake came slithering out of the back room. Crowley would occasionally be awakened by a brave customer petting him or Aziraphale whispering a loving phase as he walked past.


	9. Chapter 9

Gabriel walked into the Metatron room. The blue light in the middle formed a face. “Gabriel. I presume you come with news of the demon Crowley.”

Gabriel nodded curtly. “I do. He has turned down the offer.”

“Well, then we shall send Michael as our ambassador to earth.”

“Yes. However,” Gabriel paused, “might I suggest that we send two as we had planned before. That would help prevent them from fraternizing with whoever hell sends to earth.”

Metatron thought for a moment. “Ok. That sounds reasonable. Do you have a recommendation?”

“Yes. I think sending an ex-demon was a good idea. Crowley said no but we could ask another one, perhaps Lord Beelzebub?” Gabriel said hesitantly. 

“Alright,” Metatron replied, “You may ask Beelzebub if she would like to come back to heaven and be an ambassador.”

Gabriel gave a slight bow. “Thank you, Metatron,” he said before leaving and heading down the stairs to hell. 

Gabriel immediately felt out of place when he stepped into the dark, damp room of hell. Demons glanced up at him, fear in their eyes. As he walked, they parted, giving him a wide berth. He tried to get directions to the throne room but no one would talk to him. He was close to giving up when Beelzebub herself appeared before him. 

She grabbed his tie, pulling him down to her level. “What are you doing here?” she hissed. 

Gabriel was taken aback by seeing Beelzebub. She was as beautiful as she had been the day she fell. He hadn’t been able to appreciate it when they were trying to start armageddon. But now, with his face just inches from hers, he could. He forced himself to remain professional. “I...I have an offer from Metatron.”

Beelzebub snapped her fingers and they were suddenly in the throne room. She released his tie and sat down on her throne. She was pleased to see Gabriel, as angry as she acted. She looked him up and down. She smiled when she realized how hard he was having to work at concealing his attraction. She opened her wings to see how he would react to the red cardinal feathers. His reaction was the same as before the fall. His eyes widened and he had to focus very hard on breathing to distract himself. “So, what do you want?” she asked. 

Gabriel took a deep breath. “Heaven needs a new ambassador angel. We are sending Michael but we thought it might be wise to have another angel, to prevent the corruption we saw in Aziraphale. I recommend you for the job.”

Beelzebub raised an eyebrow. “Why? I’m not a angel anymore. Remember?”

“Well, that could change,” Gabriel stated, “There is a way to restore a demon to an angel. You could get out of the dreadful place.”

“Hell isn’t so bad once you get used to it. I mean, I’m in charge, thanks to you. Why would I leave this?” Beelzebub already knew she was going to say yes but things were never that simple with her. 

“Me?” Gabriel offered hesitantly. “If you're an angel again, we can be together.” He moved for the first time and stepped up to the throne. He took her hand and pulled her up. “Don’t tell me you don’t miss it,” he said, placing a hand on her waist and leaning her back. He could feel her heart pound. He leaned his face close to hers as if he was going to kiss her. He pulled back, however, as his lips brushed hers. She was still a demon, after all. 

“Alright,” she said, “I’ll go with you.” She pulled out of his arms and dusted herself off. She took his hand and he teleported them back up to heaven. 

Metatron ordered Gabriel to leave while the transformation was being done. When the doors opened again, he could tell the difference in Beelzebub’s aura. He smiled and opened his arms as she walked out. She pulled him down again, this time not to threaten him, but to kiss him.

When they pulled away from each other, Gabriel muttered something about debriefing her for her job but Beelzebub didn’t listen. She pulled him into his office instead. 

Back down in hell, it didn’t take long for word to get around that Beelzebub had vanished. With the rumors of Gabriel coming down and Beelzebub and his secret meeting, they figured she had been killed. Hastur landed the spot as the new Prince Of Hell. He selected Dagon as the new ambassador to earth.


	10. Chapter 10

Aziraphale locked the shop doors and turned off most of the lights. He kissed Crowley’s head, waking him. “My dear, it’s time to go home,” he said. 

Crowley looked around. Seeing no one was still in the store, he changed back into his human form. He pulled some sunglasses out of nowhere and put them on. “Yes. Indeed it is.” He slid off the counter and took Aziraphale’s hand. 

They walked out to where Crowley had parked the Bentley. Crowley picked a ticket off his windshield and it disintegrated in his hand. “No one needs that,” he said as the ashes fell to the ground. They got in and drove back to the flat. 

Neither of them wanted to cook today. Crowley didn’t really feel like eating either but Aziraphale did so they ordered take out. 

Crowley got the door when the delivery boy arrived.

“Here’s your order, sir. Your total is £25,” he said. 

Crowley took the bag. “Demon’s don’t pay for things,” Crowley said. 

“Are you saying you’re a demon?”

“Yeah,” Crowley said, pulling his glasses down so the delivery boy could see his slitted eyes. 

The delivery boy just stared at him, “Cool contacts bro, but you still owe me £25.”

“Leave the poor boy alone, Crowley,” Aziraphale called from the kitchen. 

Crowley groaned. “Fine!” he called back. “Sorry,” he said to the kid before closing the door, still without paying. He brought the bag over to the table. 

Aziraphale immediately started rummaging through it. He pulled out the wonton soup and miracled it into a bowl and a silver spoon. “So, how did your discussion with Gabriel go?” Aziraphale asked Crowley. 

Crowley winced at the memory. “It was alright. I feel like he wasn’t telling me something though.”

“Do you suppose whoever does get sent will leave us alone?”

“He said they would but I don’t trust Gabriel.”

Aziraphale nodded in agreement. “On another note, I think it would be wise to keep an eye on Adam. I think he still has powers,” he said. 

Crowley chuckled, “Can’t blame him for keeping his powers. Every kid dreams of having superpowers. How are we supposed to keep an eye on him? After all, if he does have powers and he doesn’t want to be followed, we won’t be able to.”

“I was thinking we could get a cottage in the South Downs. We could watch over him more easily from there. I think that he considers us sort of his guardian angels. He’s asked if I could help him with various things every so often.”

“Really?” Crowley said, “Alright. Sounds reasonable. Did you have a place in mind or should we spend the night looking for a house?”

“Well,” Aziraphale began, “I have looked at a few but most of them were sold a while ago. I have kind of been looking at houses in the South Downs for a while.”

Crowley looked at his angel in shock. “You’ve been thinking about this for a while have you?”

Aziraphale looked away. “Yeah. About two years,” he said, sheepishly. 

“Angel, why didn’t you tell me?” Crowley asked. He was slightly offended that his husband hadn’t told him he wanted to move. 

“I wasn’t sure yet and I wasn’t sure how you would feel leaving the city. You always liked big crowds.”

“Yeah but I like you more. If you want to go to the South Downs we will, Angel,” Crowley said, gently. 

Aziraphale grinned. “Great,” he said. Aziraphale’s computer appeared on the table and he forgot about his soup. He quickly pulled up a few tabs.

Crowley moved so he could see the screen. The first house was surrounded by trees. It had a kitchen, a living room, a bathroom, and a bedroom. It also came with 2 acres of land. “It seems a bit small for the two of us, don’t you think?”

“Well, technically we don’t need anything else.”

“Yes but you're going to want a place to put your books and I like having more than I need.”

“Alright, the next one is bigger. It has a second story. The second story is a studio and another bedroom. Outside has just a front yard where we could put a garden and some bees.

“Alright. What about this third tab?” Crowley said. 

Aziraphale clicked the last tab. It was also two stories. The first story had a kitchen, a living room, a bedroom, and a bathroom. The second story had two more rooms and an observatory type place. This one also had a separate garage. The front yard was large enough for not only a garden and bees but a porch if they wanted to put one in. 

“Oh,” Crowley said, “I like this one. We can have our room down stairs and use one of the upper ones as a library. I can keep my house plants in the observatory and I’m sure we’ll find a use for the last room.”

“Yes,”Aziraphale agreed, “I did like this one the best.”

“Then it’s decided. Let’s meet with the owner and buy it,” Crowley said. “Do you have any money?” he asked.

“I have some from the book store. It should be enough to pay for this.”

Crowley eyed Aziraphale suspiciously, “Are you sure? This is a costly cottage.”

Aziraphale nodded, “I don’t buy much and what few books I do sell are expensive so I have quite a bit saved up.”

“Wow.” Crowley had no idea the book shop actually made money. “Are you going to keep the shop running? It’s a long way to travel everyday.”

Aziraphale shrugged, “I don’t know. I hadn’t really thought about it.”


	11. Chapter 11

Michael and Beelzebub had been on earth for a week now. Michael had tried several times to get away from Beelzebub to see what the rebels were doing. She had to get revenge on Crowley and tonight was her lucky night.

Beelzebub stuck her head into Michael’s room. “I’m going to go to headquarters. Don’t cause any trouble while I’m gone.”

Michael looked up. If Beelzebub was in Heaven, she could go out. “How long will you be gone?” she asked, masking her excitement. 

“Probably until tomorrow afternoon. Maybe later,” Beelzebub responded.

“Ok,” Michael said, relaxing back in her chair. 

Beelzebub walked away. Michael waited until she heard the door close behind her partner before standing up, taking down her hair, and leaving, as well. 

Michael decided her first stop would be the bookshop. She teleported to the alley next to it. She looked in the windows but it was dark. She snuck around the back. Although the windows were shaded, she could see that the lights were off in the back room as well. Michael was not the sort of angel who gave up easily, however. Michael walked back out to the main road. She looked around and saw a homeless man sitting across the street from the shop. She walked over to him. “Hello, I am looking for a man. He goes to that book shop frequently. I was wondering if you might know where he is?” she asked. 

The man looked up at her curiously. “Well, I’m here everyday. I know a few of the regulars here. Can you describe him?”

“He has bright red hair and drives a black Bentley. He is probably usually with the shop owner,” Michael said. 

“Ah, yeah I know the bloke! Why, are you a friend of his?” the man asked. 

Michael nodded, “Yes, I am.”

“Well then, I don't know where he is now but I have seen his car at an apartment building on Main Street.”

“Thank you,” Michael said, putting a 50 pound note into the man’s hand. 

The man looked in awe at the bill he had just been given. He looked back up at Michael. “No, thank you!” he said. 

Michael headed to Main Street. When she got there she saw the Bentley parked in front of the building, just as the man said it would be. She stared up at the tall, black tower. She thought about what she knew about Crowley. From what she had gleaned from Ligur, Crowley probably rented the penthouse. She figured Crowley would never settle for less. She obviously couldn’t just walk into the apartment so she looked around for another way in. 

After inquiring a bit of the locals, she learned that the place did not have an attic but it had a basement and that the man who rented that apartment was a bit odd. She decided she would have to fly up. She went to the least crowded side of the building and miracled some distractions so that people didn’t notice when she unfurled her golden brown wings. She took to the sky in a flash. As she approached the top level, she slowed down. She cautiously poked her head up to one of the windows. She saw nothing but plants. They were a bit larger then she would have expected house plants to be. Seeing no Crowley she moved on to the next one. 

When she looked in the next window, she saw Crowley and Aziraphale sitting with their backs to her, crowded around a computer. One she was certain was from a few decades ago. She shrugged off the odd computer as she strained her ears to listen through the glass. She only caught a few bits of the conversation. “Should we re…” “I think...penny” But what intrigues her most was what she saw. After a few minutes of looking at the screen, Crowley stood up. Michael ducked down a moment when he did. After a few moments, she looked up again. Aziraphale was now standing and they headed into the next room. Crowley remained in the room with the plants while Aziraphale continued into the bedroom. He sat down on the bed, opened a book, and started reading. 

She heard a commotion in the plant room and flew back over to that window. She watched as Crowley shouted vague threats at the plants. The same sort of ones she had heard him telling the other demons while he was sitting in the holy water bath. He had a yellow spray bottle in one hand that he was misting the plants with. After shouting one last, “You are this close to being sent down the disposal!” He set down the bottle and headed into the bedroom.

Aziraphale looked up from his book when Crowley came in before setting it on the nightstand. Crowley slid into the other side of the bed. Aziraphale laid down properly and turned to face Crowley. They kissed each other before closing their eyes and, as far as Michael could tell, going to sleep. 

Michael was reeling. Aziraphale and Crowley had just kissed each other. She wondered if she should report their new relationship to Gabriel. But she couldn’t do that. She had been given strict orders not to go near the two of them. She would have to deal with it herself. She flew back to her house and thought about what she should do.


	12. Chapter 12

Aziraphale and Crowley had just finished packing up the last of the things in the apartment. They carried the boxes down to the moving truck. The movers closed up the truck. Crowley gently moved his plants down as well, setting them in the back seat of his car.

Aziraphale and Crowley got into the Bentley and drove to their new house. The movers showed up a few minutes after them. They pulled out the boxes and set them in the living room. They directed the movers to put the furniture in place. Well, close enough to in place.

Once the moving truck had left, they opened the boxes. Aziraphale took the books he kept out of the shop up stairs to put them in their new library. Crowley took the bedroom decor and bedding into their room.

Aziraphale came down to see how Crowley was doing in the bedroom. What he saw surprised him. “Crowley, dear, what did you do?”

Crowley turned around. “I decorated it. You were busy so I did it. Do you like it?”

Aziraphale frowned. “Like is not the word I would use. For starters, why is the rug on the wall? Having that statue on the head board is a bad idea. It’s liable to fall. And the bed should definitely not be in the middle of the room,” he said.

Crowley looked at all the things Aziraphale mentioned. He was right about the statue. That headboard did a fair bit of moving some nights. “Ok, you're right about the statue but hanging a rug is very common. It preserves the colors because people aren’t stepping on it. And having the bed in the middle prevents things from falling behind it so we can’t reach.”

Aziraphale sighed and snapped his fingers. The bed slid backwards to the wall. The statue appeared on the pedestal it always had been on before and Crowley had to jump out of the way as the rug flew off the wall towards his spot on the ground.

“Angel,” Crowley cried, “you’ve ruined all my hard work!”

“No, I’ve _fixed_ your hard work,” Aziraphale said matter of factly.

Crowley sighed reluctantly. “Fine. Let’s go deal with the kitchen next.”

Aziraphale smiled. “Yes, let’s do that,” he said, walking out.

The rest of unpacking went relatively smoothly with only a few debates on positioning of things. Aziraphale usually won. After everything else was done, he left Crowley to set his plants up in the observatory alone.

Crowley pulled some shelves out of the air and placed them strategically around the room. He placed the plants with such care and second guessing, you would think he was looking for optimal lighting or some such, but he was just being really indecisive. Eventually, he finished. He opened up the observatory roof to see how it would look in the light. As soon as he did, Crowley was knocked to the ground and a knife was at his throat in an instant. He looked down at it then up to see who was holding it. He was surprised to see Michael. “Michael, what-” he began.

Michael cut him off. “Hello, Crowley,” she hissed.

Crowley raised an eyebrow, “Hey, Michael...um...what are you doing?”

“I’m here to kill you. Remember Ligur, and what you did to him? He was my best friend. When you killed him, you picked a fight with an archangel, a fight you can’t win.”

“Oh, yeah,” Crowley said, “I do remember you two being close before the lot of us fell but I never took you for the fraternizing type.”

“I wasn’t. But when Aziraphale consistently refused orders and performed extremely questionable miracles I saw that, with a bit of a shove, I could get his job. But I need some help so I called an old friend. Conveniently, he wanted your job as well. I have to admit, you two were careful. We couldn’t find any proof of your friendship until Amagedon was imminent. After that whole debacle, I heard Ligur was killed _by you_. So I watched you, learned your habits, found out where you were living, found out about your boyfriend.”

“Ok, but if you want to kill me, I would suggest a different weapon. A knife’ll just discorperate me. A few years and I’ll be back on my feet.”

Michael smiled and laughed, “Oh, this isn’t any old knife. This is an angel blood blade. I would use holy water, you deserve holy water, but that clearly doesn’t work on you. Hopefully this will.”

Crowley looked down at the weapon Michael held against him. It looked much like a regular knife but he noticed the tell tale signs of an angel blood blade. He was about to die. He couldn’t let that happen. Not when things were just beginning to go smoothly. He started to panic, wracking his brain for an out.

Aziraphale appeared in the doorway. “Michael! What are you doing to my husband?”

Michael was taken by surprise. She looked over at Aziraphale. “Husband?” she cried.

Crowley took advantage of Michael’s momentary lapse of focus to kick her off of him. She was flung across the room, the blade fell from her grip. Aziraphale ran over to get it away from her.

Crowley leapt to his feet, opening his wings as he did. He charged Michael pinning her to the floor. “Yes, husband of about 250 years. Now get _out_!”

Michael knew she had failed. She stood up and dusted herself off. She glared at Aziraphale and Crowley. She muttered an insult before flying out the observatory roof the same way she came in.

Aziraphale rushed over to Crowley. He wrapped his arms around Crowley, supporting him. “Are you ok?” he asked urgently.

Crowley nodded. “Yeah. I’m fine,” he said. Crowley took the knife from Aziraphale. “I wonder how she got her hands on one of these,” he muttered as he inspected it.

“She must have some good contacts.”

Crowley looked up from it. “Well, it’s unlikely she will get another any time soon,” he said, “We should be safe for a while.”

They locked the blade in a safe before going to bed.


	13. Chapter 13

Crowley and Aziraphale sat across the table from each other eating breakfast. “I think we should check in on Adam today,” Aziraphale said. 

“Hmm. That would probably be a good idea. But, how? We can’t just walk in and say ‘Hey, we’re just here to make sure you don't go crazy with those powers of yours again. Don’t mind us,’” Crowley said. 

“We could join their games. All four of them were there when everything happened with the apocalypse. They know us,” Aziraphale replied. 

Crowley shrugged. “Well, worth a shot at least,” he said. After finishing their meal and miricalling away the dishes, they drove to the Hogback woods. After a bit of meandering for a while, they found The Them. They heard the kids before they saw them. 

“I want to play knights and dragons.”

“Ok. Who’s the dragon?”

“Ooh. I’ll be a dragon. Rawr!”

“I’m a knight. I slay dragons! Stab stab!”

“Wait, why should we kill it? It probably has enough gold that it would be willing to share.”

“Everyone knows that dragons don’t-” Adam looked up at the sound of footsteps on the leaves. “Hello, guys!” he said as Aziraphale and Crowley walked down, into the hollow. Dog ran up to sniff the newcomers. 

Aziraphale bent down to pick up the dog. It licked his face happily as he pet it. 

“You know that’s a hell hound, right?” Crowley said. 

Aziraphale nodded. “Well, yeah but he’s so cute.”

Crowley shrugged and turned to Adam and the Them. “Hello, Adam. We just came to see how you are doing. Mind if we join your game?”

Adam nodded, “Sure.”

Aziraphale set Dog down. As much as they had said they could join the game, everyone had forgotten about it. They remembered the two odd men from their adventure at the air base. It had been very exciting.

Pepper spoke up, “Are you here to start another adventure? If you are, can you make sure Adam doesn’t go...mad again?”

Aziraphale chuckled. “No,” he said, “We are here to make sure no new adventures start up.”

“But I liked that adventure,” said Brian. 

“W...well,” Aziraphale stuttered, looking over at Crowley for help. 

Crowley caught his eye and butted in. “Well, you can still have perhaps smaller adventures,” he said. 

That seemed to sit well with the Them. “Well alright,” Brian said, “Do you have any ideas?”

“Maybe we can go to the park? We can play all sorts of games there,” Wendslydale offered. 

The rest of The Them nodded in agreement. “Alright,” said Adam, “we’ll go there. Are you guys coming too?”

Aziraphale and Crowley nodded hesitantly. The Them jumped onto their bikes and raced out of the woods to the park. Aziraphale and Crowley fell behind. When the two of them finally reached the park, The Them were playing a game on the roundabout. They seemed to be having a very good time. Crowley and Aziraphale sat down on a bench next to a mother who was watching her son. 

“Which one is yours?” she asked. 

“Oh um...” Aziraphale began but realized that he didn’t have an answer. Two men at a park just watching children would not likely go over well. 

Crowley replied without missing a beat, “Those four,” he said, pointing over to the Them.

The woman smiled. “That one is my son, she said pointing to the swings, “he raises tropical fish.”

Crowley nodded. “Ours raised hell once,” Crowley said in competition. 

“Don’t they all,” the woman replied. 

Aziraphale jabbed Crowley in the side before he could say anything else. 

After an hour or so, the Them became bored with their games and wandered over to Crowley and Aziraphale. They were discussing something about desserts when Adam turned to Aziraphale. “I heard that in America, they have 31 different flavors of ice cream. Is that true?”

“Well, we’ve never been to America. We tried once but we never got there. That was Crowley’s fault,” Aziraphale said.

Crowley looked at Aziraphale. “How was it my fault?” he asked. 

“You said it was unsinkable which it clearly wasn’t,” he replied. 

“I was wrongly informed but that doesn’t make it my fault,” Crowley interjected, “but that’s not the point. There are indeed 31 ice cream flavors. In fact, there are many more. We could do an ice cream tasting tomorrow.”

The kids cheered when Crowley suggested this.


	14. Chapter 14

On the way home that night, Azirphale asked, “Do you really think it’s a good idea to give a bunch of kids that much sugar?”

“It’ll be fine Angel. We aren’t their parents,” Crowley said.

“That’s another thing, why did you tell the woman they were our kids?” Aziraphale said.

“You said it yourself, they think of us as their guardian angels or something. Also, it would be weird if we just sat down at a park and none of them were ours.”

They pulled into the garage. As Crowley unlocked the door he heard a thud and Azirphale saying, “Ow.” He spun around. Aziraphale was staring down at an arrow sticking out of his arm. “Oh dear,” he said before fainting. Crowley rushed forward to catch him. He pulled the arrow out of the angel's arm. _Oh no_. He looked frantically around. He couldn’t be sure but he thought he saw a flash of brown feathers in the trees beyond their property.

He hurriedly picked up Aziraphale and carried him inside. He laid him gently on the bed. He tore off his shirt and inspected the wound. A dark blue liquid trickled out, staining the bed. _You really do have blue blood_ , he thought. He hurriedly cleaned and bandaged the wound. After he made sure Aziraphale was comfortable, he was still sleeping but seemed stable, Crowley looked at the arrow.

It was incredibly well crafted. The dark brown fletching was perfectly even, the knock cleanly cut. A golden arrow head drenched in blue was neatly binded into the shaft. He’d seen these before. They were one time use shots that drained an angel or demon of its power. Although they only worked once, if you knew what you were doing they were simple enough to make. He couldn’t believe Michael would stoop this low. Michael’s quarrel had nothing to do with Aziraphale. He snapped the arrow in half. “I’ll kill her,” he growled.

He heard Aziraphale groan and call to him from the other room. He ran in to see if he was ok. “Hey Angel,” he said, “How do you feel?”

Aziraphale struggled to sit up. Crowley put an arm behind to help him. Once Aziraphale was settled against the headboard he replied, “I feel weak and my arm really hurts.” His eyes lit up and he remembered the arrow, “Crowley, she made a draining arrow.”

“Shh,” Crowley said, “I know. I bandaged you up, see?”

Aziraphale looked at the gauze wrapped sloppily around his arm. “Oh, so I do have blue blood,” he muttered.

Crowley nodded. “You won’t have your powers anymore. Make sure to be careful. Michael might target you again.”

Though neither of them could prove it, they both knew that this was Michael’s work. They made sure to lock all their doors and windows before they went to bed that night. The darkness that draped over the woods was no longer peaceful but dangerous.


	15. Chapter 15

Crowley glanced at the clock. It was 3 am. He looked over at Aziraphale. He was sleeping soundly beside him. Crowley smiled. As much as Aziraphale was always talking about not needing sleep and how it was a waste of time, he sure seemed to enjoy it. He winced as he remembered that now, Aziraphale _did_ need sleep.

Crowley got out of the bed, careful not to wake Aziraphale. He walked out into the cool night air. He started walking to the forest. Crowley didn’t dare take his car for fear the engine would wake Aziraphale.

He found a small clearing in the woods, away from the cottage and Adam’s grove. “Michael!” he called. He knew Michael would be near. “This has nothing to do with Aziraphale. If you want me, come and fight me.”

Crowley stood and listened for a moment. He didn’t hear anything. “I know you’re here Michael. Come out and fight!”

He heard a ruffle of feathers behind him and spun around. Michael stood at the other end of the clearing, a bow in her hands and an arrow fitted in the knock. Her huge brown wings folded behind her but still visible. “You called?” she said, calmly.

Crowley glared at her, rage pulsing through his veins. “Why did you shoot Aziraphale? Your quarrel is with me.”

“He was in the way. As long as he is around, I would never be able to get to you. I shot him in a non-lethal spot for a reason,” Michael stated.

“You put him at a disadvantage for years. If he dies because of that, I’ll kill you,” Crowley spat. Michael’s calm demeanor just made him angrier.

“Oh, you won’t be around to follow through on that threat.”

“We’ll see about that,” Crowley said before charging her.

She loosed an arrow in his direction but he dodged and the arrow hit a tree. She had to dodge him leaping at her before she could fire another shot.

Crowley turned and had to duck as an arrow flew at him. He turned into a snake and slithered up a tree. He followed the branches, barely being missed by several more shots, until he was above her. He dropped out of the tree onto Michael.

Michael let out a shout as Crowley fell on her. She managed to hold onto the bow, however, the arrows in her quiver spilled. She heaved the snake off of her and scrambled to her feet. She grabbed an arrow from the ground but didn’t fire it.

Crowley slithered to the other end of the clearing and reared his head. He hissed at her, almost daring her to shoot but she didn’t. He began to wonder what she was plotting. He glanced around out of the corner of his eyes to see if something had caused her to stop. Seeing nothing, he turned his focus to Michael again. He slowly moved around the clearing, watching for her trigger. He saw it coming a mile away. He watched the arrow fly well over his head. He laughed, and looked back at her.

Michael watched as Crowley followed the arrow. She quickly stooped down and grabbed another. She had barely knocked it before letting it go. Just as Crowley turned his focus back to Michael, it hit its mark.

Crowley felt the impact of the arrow long before it hurt. His form shifted back into that of a human. He looked down, the arrow stuck out of his stomach.

“Hey!” he heard someone shout. It sounded familiar but Crowley couldn’t place it. His vision started to fade. He heard Michael distantly calling, “I told you, this is a fight you can’t win.” He felt arms wrap around him and felt he was being lifted before his mind faded as well.


	16. Chapter 16

The first thing Crowley registered when he woke up was that he heard voices. He opened his eyes to see who was there but quickly shut them. It was painfully bright, wherever he was. He felt no inclination to open his eyes ever again, until he heard Aziraphale. 

“Crowley! You’re awake!” he said. 

Crowley’s eyes snapped open again, enduring the searing light until they adjusted. He looked around. Azirpahle was sitting in a chair, looking at him with worry. Crowley sat up, his stomach hurt as he did. He was in a bed, a hospital bed. He hated hospitals. “Angel,” he said carefully, “why am I in a hospital.”

Aziraphale frowned. “You were shot in the stomach, remember? Any human who sustains an injury like that needs to go to the hospital.”

Crowley rolled his eyes. “Right,” he grunted. He laid back down. If it was up to him he would have lept up and run out but he knew Aziraphale would never let him past the door.

A nurse came in. “Ah, Mr. Crowley,” she said in a peppy voice, “you’re awake. How do you feel?”

Crowley looked up at his nurse. He was going to give a snappy reply but a stern look from Aziraphale shut him up. “I feel about as good as I can expect to be. My stomach aches though.”

The nurse nodded and wrote a few things down on her clipboard. “You’re lucky the arrow didn’t hit any vital organs. Your husband, Mr. Fell, told me you guys were walking by an archery range when you were struck by an arrow. Is that correct?”

Crowley nodded. He just wanted to get out. He’d always hated being near hospitals but being in one as a patient was much worse. The worst things Hell had told him to do had involved hospitals. Of course, they were also the best things he had done for Aziraphale. 

The nurse wrote a few more things on her board before turning and leaving. 

Crowley looked over to Aziraphale. He saw his eyes watching his hand. “Go ahead,” he said. 

Azirpahle quickly took Crowley’s hand and smiled. “I was so scared, Crowley. You shouldn’t have gone after her on your own,” he said. 

After answering more mundane questions from the doctors, Crowley was finally allowed to go home. It was lunch time and Crowley had refused to eat the food the hospital had given him. For the first time ever, he felt hungry. At first, he didn’t recognize it. His stomach felt tight. Crowley just attributed it to his injury but then it started making noises, like an earthquake coming from his belly. He sat through it until they got home. Finally, he couldn’t stand it. “Aziraphale, what is my stomach doing? It’s making noises.” he asked. 

Azirpahle laughed, “That would be hunger, my dear. You need to eat.”

Crowley rolled his eyes. “I hate being mortal,” he said as he barged into the house. 

Aziraphale offered to cook them lunch while Crowley figured out one of the other problems that come along with being mortal: going to the bathroom. 

When Crowley came out, Azirpahle could tell something had changed. 

“What’s that look about?” he asked. 

“My eyes!” Crowley exclaimed, “They are normal. The pupils are round and I don’t have to try to keep them in the right shape.”

Aziraphale frowned. “My dear,” he said, putting his hand on Crowley’s cheek, “why do you hate your serpent eyes so much? They are so beautiful.”

Crowley’s smile faded. “You think so?”

“Of course, my love. I never understood why you hid them behind those glasses,” Aziraphale replied. 

Crowley smiled again but more softly this time. He hummed in thought.

They sat down to eat. Crowley found he enjoyed food a lot more when he was hungry. 

They had just finished when Aziraphale remembered that they had promised The Them an ice cream tasting today. “We were supposed to give The Them ice cream in 31 flavors today!” he exclaimed

“We can’t. We’ve lost our power.”

“Well,” Aziraphale said, “We should at least go and apologize for not making it.”

Crowley huffed. “Yeah, probably,” he said.

They drove out to the hollow and found The Them playing a game that involved wizards and bikes. The children turned their heads expectantly towards them when they entered. 

“Where’s the ice cream?” Wensleydale asked, seeing them empty handed. 

“Nice to see you too,” Crowley said. 

Azirpahle rolled his eyes at Crowley’s comment. “That’s why we came here. We can’t have the ice cream party today. Things...came up.”

Pepper, Brian, and Wensleydale groaned in disappointment. Adam sat there on his throne in thoughtful silence.

“Can we do it tomorrow?” Pepper asked. 

Crowley shook his head. “No. We can’t. Sorry,” he said. 

Adam was about to say something when a shadow fell over the clearing. They all looked up. Crowley recognized it first. 

Michael descended into the clearing, her wings stirring up the fallen leaves. Crowley turned to The Them. “Run! Get out of here!” he shouted before whipping back around to face Michael. “What now?” he said. 

Aziraphale watched in terror. He knew he was only in danger if he got between them. He didn’t care. He stepped up next to Crowley, balling his fists and staring daggers.

Michael gave Aziraphale a regretful look as he stepped forward. “I saw I didn’t shoot you right last time so I came to finish the job. But now, it’s easier. You’re both powerless.”

Crowley looked over at Aziraphale. “Stand down,” he wispered. 

Aziraphale shook his head. 

“Yes,” Crowley insisted, “There is no need for you to die too.”

Aziraphale sighed. “Don’t make me, please,” he whispered. Crowley’s gaze didn’t falter. Azirpahle stepped right up to Crowley. He put both hands on his face. He wanted to cry. He saw tears in Crowley’s eyes as well. He kissed Crowley and hugged him. “I love you,” he whispered. 

Crowley hugged him back. “I love you, too Angel. Take care of The Them,” he replied. 

Michael cleared her throat. The lovers released each other.

“Make sure they don’t see this,” Crowley said. 

Azirpahle nodded and turned around. He was surprised to see Adam standing there. The rest of the kids were peeking out from behind trees. “Adam-” he began. 

“Crowley can’t fight you but I can,” Adam said to Michael. 

Michael looked with surprise at the child standing in the clearing. “Kid, you should get out of here,” she advised. 

Adam stepped forward between Crowley and Michael. “No. These two saved the world. It’s because of them my family and friends are still alive. You’ll leave them alone.” Clouds darkened the sky, covering the sun. They could all hear thunder in the distance as the wind picked up. 

Michael smirked. “You think a little thunder and lightning will scare me off?” she scoffed. She opened her wings to their full size and stared down Adam. 

A bolt of lighting came crashing down and hit her wing. She screamed and instinctively pulled it in. When the flash was gone she saw a large clump of feathers was gone and the skin underneath burned. A searing pain arched across her wing with the slightest movent. Pain was not something Michael was accustomed to. “How?” she muttered. 

Aziraphale and Crowley watched as the exchange happened. At least now they knew Adam still had powers. 

Adam took another step toward Michael, whose wings were now wrapped defensively around her. “I said you’ll leave them alone. In fact, I think it would be best if you left England altogether. It’s under my protection.”

Michale looked like she wanted to say something but thought better of it. She put her wings behind her and stood up straighter, trying to maintain what remained of her dignity. “Fine,” she said. She opened her wings, as painful as it was, and flew off. 

The sky cleared and the rest of The Them ventured out from their trees. Crowley turned to Adam and rushed towards him. He threw himself into a hug. “Thank you, Adam,” he said. The moment didn’t last long as Adam didn’t return the hug and everyone else just stared at him. Crowley quickly grew self conscious and straightened himself up. 

“You’re welcome,” Adam replied. When he said that, Crowley and Azirphale felt stronger and any traces of hunger and fatigue they had vanished. He then turned back to his friends. “Who wants to play a game?” he asked. His friends cheered and The Them ran off to play. 

Crowley and Aziraphale watched them. “I think he’ll be just fine,” they both said. They smiled at each other, then, hand in hand, walked home.


End file.
